the lover...

Most people will experience having a lover at a certain point in their life. It may be when you are young, you have a crush on your college lecturer and he reciprocates that love (or lust is more like it). You lie to your parents about doing revision after hours , well yeah, literally - on bedroom positions.

Some may have many lovers when they are single. Just to play the field before settling down with one. Some people have them after marriage, when either husband or wife devoid the other of sex. And some like me get one inadvertently.

I met him when I was on a holiday. It was the local festivities and everyone was naturally high and happy and easy going. Well at least my friends were. After taking too much weed and alcohol, they started passing out one by one. It was only 10pm. I just stepped out of the hotel hoping for a good night out but was stuck being a driver to everyone else. After 2 hours, everyone was home and safe, albeit either sleeping outside their garden or gagging away in their toilets.

All was not lost, as Alison was still with a friend at a local bar. And lucky for me, her date brought a very cute guy along. We hit it off immediately, more so after taking 3 vodkas straight up since the bar was closing. So we went off to another club that has filthy air and head banging people, and enjoyed what was left of the night, sipping beers and flirting with each other.

“So, are you single?” comes the first personal question.

“Are you?”

“I can be if you want me to be”

You can read a lot from that phrase. Either he is married but still available, single and committed or plain damn horny.

Nothing happened anyway. I didn’t really trust a guy who can’t decide if he is taken or not. But he sure was cute and charming. We exchanged contact nonetheless.

“You know what will be a waste?”

“Me not seeing you again”

I nominate that to be the best closing pick up line ever - if there is such a thing. So I promised a next date.

i am back...

I miss coming here so much. Am sorry for the long absence. It has been a few hectic months, the work load and the travelling. But am abck now and the posts will keep coming...

Blind Dates

I recently went on a blind date with a person who emailed me on my friendly friendster program. He left a short little note on my Inbox which I only read 9 months after. Thinking that I should not be rude, I wrote back and apologise for not returning his mail and sort of introduce myself. After 2 more emails back and forth we decided to chat on the messenger to get to know each other.

It was fun, really, he was educated in the UK, was in the IT industry managing systems, he seems perfectly normal and humorous and I had great conversations with him. After many hours of long but meaningful typing and typing conversations, he gathered that I was this perfect person for him, we’ll I cant really say likewise but as I was a firm believer of chemistry between people, so I asked to meet.

Dinner was always not a good idea for first casual dates, and if you don’t know why, try picturing yourself being stuck eating lamb with William Hung. So I opt for coffee instead.

I went there early ordered my latte and read my book. Minutes later, he turned up.

“Cant imagine you were earlier than me?”

I cant imagine I came here for you too! Then he just disappeared to get his drink. I was then frantically making plans for an escape route.

It was not his looks that really put me off, but his imagination.

Even before we got to know each other well, even before I agreed on a second date, he was making assumptions of “if you were my girlfriend”.

“I don’t mind if you smoke but make sure you have some mints before I kiss you.”

My head was rolling then. How can men be so ignorant? Aren’t there enough written materials on the internet to teach you the how to’s and not’s of first dates?

I never felt more trapped. Luckily my knight in a shining dress came to the rescue – dearest Hazel came just in time and we went to the nearest water hole to meet real men.

Of course I had the decency to tell him I am not going to see him again, but I think he got the point when I started rolling my eyes.

Guys, please do me a favour and sharpen your skills ok?

I came multiple times!

So from the last mission, we started to get to know the fruits of our labour. Hazel met Dave from the party and they have sort of starting dating after that. Dave is this very tall but skinny guy who works as an accountant in a medium sized firm. He seems very nice but has this weird way of talking about what he likes in his life, that leads to endless mumblings after a while – sounds something like someone talking to himself? And when I commented “Do all accountants talk like that?” he got annoyed and told Hazel in private that I am too stuck up for his liking so we never met again. Beats me??!

From Hazel’s point of view, Dave seems to be a very nice guy and she is growing fond of him every time they meet. "He seems really nice and genuine you know, kisses really well to." Well, all I can say is that, “We’ll see after the sex”.

But sex, in Joe’s book, is the first thing you do before you do the dating. The first time they fucked was the day they met. Felix did well though, that’s why they are still fucking. In Joe’s exact words – “Felix is what I call a modern man. One with a big tool and skills to match. We have been doing each other for a month now and it is still exciting!”

I really had to ask then “What constitutes excitement? Pray tell!”

Joe gave us a complete picture.

“Felix would meet me at a bar and then pretend to pick me up for the first time. He will be daring and bold and start feeling me at our table, putting his hands beneath my skirt, licking my chest, kissing my ears while whispering naughty stuff like “ I cant wait to put my growing cock into your wet pussy” Of course, we adjourned to the toilet and did the deed coz none of us can make it back to my house.

Then the other time he came very unexpectedly to my house. When I opened the door, he pinned me down to the floor, pretending to be a rapist. He tied me to my study table, asked me to shut up and obey or he will slap me – which he did when I started struggling in pretense. But it was so kinky! He was wearing a mask and all, keeps telling me not to struggle and then he just tore my panties off and fucked me so hard, I came multiple times! It was totally refreshing.”

After her stories, we had mixed feelings of happiness and dejection. Happy for her but fell very short in comparison. None of our sex lives were as exciting. Hell, some of us have none to start with!

where were you?

You can say that I am lazy, you can say that I may still be depressed. But if you are wondering where on earth did I disappear to – you can wonder no more.

Heck, I’ll admit that I was lazy, I’d even admit that I was procrastinating but what’s most important is - that I was having a damn great time!!

After the many uphill and downhill emotional roller coaster rides for the past month, I have sobered and started getting things back to normal. Obviously with the help of my dear WAM mates as well. I have to tell you for sure that you make it in this world, not with your experiences, nor your guts nor luck but the company you keep - your FRIENDS. Friends who drags you up when you are down, pull you together when you are out, lectures the daylights outta you when you need it.

Seriously, I must thank my friends who stood by me or shouted at me and those who offered many many words or encouragement and even to those who pop me a mail asking if I’m still alive - Thank you! But I must also thank one above all. This one guy who belittle me and sent insults my way in front of a group of people. It did not break me. On the contrary, gave me the right slap on the face to continue. Thanks Asshole!

Besides all that commotion, many things have happened since the last time WAM has ever ventured out. Our very sweet first mission, seems a very long time ago. So I’ll fill you up on what’s been happening to the rest of the gang....

it's been ages...

Havent post for a really long time and it just seems like forever. I was feeling rather guilty leaving my still new blog unattended. Its like caring for a new born baby, by this time I swear it would have rot and died.

Well I'm glad to say that I'm back to normal passed the earlier depressing stage of my life. Thanks to a very good friend of mine who had been there encouraging me and telling me not to give up on life coz the road ahead will be brighter. Of course it is not just lip service. He actually read my BaZi (an accurate system to read your destiny). And it gave me a great relief and a much more positive outlook on life.

"Focus! Deal with the things that you can do, dont dwell on the things that you cannot do" Words of wisdom indeed. I have pasted a larger print out of these words in my mirror, reminding myself to focus.

I did some soul searching too. Not sure if I found it but I definetely came to terms with it and am feeling pretty good right now. I tell you its most probably due to a mixture of too much booze and weed combined with a great deal of strees and lack of sex. Oh well, thank God for the good times, curse human for the bad times.

are you lonesome tonight?

Have you ever given thought to loneliness?
Not being lonely but to be all alone?

Do you stop and wonder what loneliness means and how it affects your life? Many people feel lonely when they have lost someone in their life. Some feel lonely when they have no company, when their partner leaves them for a few days. Others may claim a preference to be alone, as being lonely has become a routine.

But there is more to loneliness than just being alone.

Ever felt lonely when you are with a group of friends? Lonely when you are drinking at a noisy club full of people? Lonely at a party thrown in your honor? Lonely even when you are in a relationship?

Is there a reason to ponder about loneliness? Well, only the lonely does.

Why you may ask, is a young attractive woman lonely. Because she is. She can be in a crowd or in a relationship and still feel lonely. There is just something missing in her life right now, something not right, and something that not anyone can fill up. That something you need and long for but can’t have.

Because it is something that someone else have to fill up. That gap, that hole, space, that has been left untouched. And it can only be filled by a willing soul with unconditional love.

Lonely screams, lonely cries, lonely dies.

First Attempt at our man…

There was a special launch party at one of the happening clubs in town which Hazel managed to get invites to for all of us and this became the official First Mission for WAM.

We decided we are all going to get to know at least 1 man, if not a few tonight. Clad on our finest, we stand out among the crowd. We always did. We are almost similar in height, with good dress sense (here’s a tip for you: you want to be noticed in a club – never wear black) and a commanding presence. We can feel heads turn when we enter, and we selected the best possible table in the club (near the bar or the toilet but not too far from the dance floor).

We ordered our drinks and started doing the one thing that always gets you attention – dance. Since Lara is the disco diva, she immediately started for the dance floor and moved her way to the stage. She has such great moves. Sexy and alluring, she got all the attention she needed.

An hour passed quickly with the speeches and games, while we become adequately intoxicated. Soon, the club returned to its norm and the night continued with more drinking and dancing. While Hazel hung around the bar talking to a tall cute chap, I was chatting with some friends I bumped into.

“Bitch! You have been missing for so long! You have gotten come to my table now and let me screw you!” squealed Grace my former colleague, who obviously had too much to drink.

So I went and I was glad I did. Turned out, she was there with her new colleagues and there were 5 men to choose from! Great!

I met David, Kent, Sean, Chan and Tom. After a few non-stop bottoms up courtesy of Grace, she collapsed onto the chair. So I made chatted and danced with Tom for a bit before Sean took over. Sean is cute. He has this bad boy charisma, which I liked instantly. He was humorous too and not a bad dancer.

Then, to escape away from Grace who has awoken and started to pass drinks around again, I took Sean outside to catch some fresh air.

We made some small talk and were enjoying the slight breeze when he suddenly said, “Are you looking for love?”

Now how in the world do you answer a question like that?

I told him Yes and No. Yes - if I do find a good match and No if you are thinking whether I am going to cling on to you like glue. Perfect answer it seems. He drag me back to the dance floor and we partied the night away.

It was quite a night. Hazel met Dave, Felix came hard on Joe, (ahem not literally) and Nat being Nat, just drank the night away.

WAM Troops

Before I go into the more juicy details of WAM – let me clue you in on the troopers riding on this mission.

Agent Nathalie

Nat – is the black sheep of the gang – not that we think so, but we know she feels so. She is totally clueless and has an inferiority complex being the ugly duckling in the group. But really, she is far from it. Despite the occasional bad hair day, what she lacks elsewhere is made right with her close to perfect body. God is fair after all. Nat has got a curvaceous body and the firmest and perkiest breast I have ever seen in my entire life (discounting the boob jobs you see on tv). But somehow she hides it all under her clothes and feels shy to disclose it. We have seen men drool over her, she just don’t know how to flaunt it (as yet).

Nat works as a PA to a tough slim ball boss who talks to her breast 85% of the time. She is not very ambitious in her career and just loves the simple things in life. Nat is our “love fool” who believes in searching for the 1 soul mate for her. Been in a few relationships and was left heart-broken, but still strongly believes in looking for that soul mate.

Agent - provocative - Lara

Lara has a similar triats liken to Cameron Diaz in Charlie’s Angels minus the clumsiness but scores better on the dance floor. If her job as an Events Manager fails she can be a dancer. Lara has been climbing up the corporate ladder steadily ever since she started working - not by sleeping around mind you, but through hard work and perseverance. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to know the right people at the right time in the right place. Lara is street smart, strong but not pushy. Man who gets to know her simply adores her. She has got this authentic look which you don’t get bored of but grow to love day after day.

Average Joes bores her out quickly. Lara tends to sleep around and never really settles down. Never had a steady boyfriend for more than 3 months too. We all put up a bet every time she gets a new boyfriend just to see how long it will last and to irritate her.

Agent - prima donna - Hazel

Hazel our artsy-fartsy scrawny shoe designer with killer looks to match has the best life among of all. Sometimes we do think – yes you can have it all. Work wise, she designs shoes and has recently been head hunted to be a head designer in a big fashion conglomerate. We swear by her designs - day in and night out. Of course we get FOC shoes specially made by her too.

Although all is bright in her career, Hazel is unfortunately single just 2 weeks ago after ending a very long relationship with now ex-boyfriend David the Saint. We call him a saint simply because he acts like one and treats Hazel like one. We thought he was to be the one and was always talking about when the big day will be. But even Saints make mistakes. The biggest one was letting Hazel walk in on him humping another bitch when she returned early from her business trip. Typical movie scene you say? I say the producer stole her story!

Last but not least…

Agent - sex god - Josephine

Joe has a knack for closing any kind of sales thrown her way. She has a way with words that make you just want to buy whatever she is selling. But sometimes we really cant stand her when she blabbers non stop. But we also love her when she can talk her way through any kind of sticky situation we may face with authorities when we all had a cup to many and she is extremely good at getting us into clubs for free or cheaper than the norm. Of course, a little nudge and wink helps. But we always tell her she shows off to much of her cleavage too often.

“Don’t you know when you expose too much skin, man thinks you are cheap? Sometimes it’s better to leave them to do the thinking with some skin – not all”, Nat insists.

“Well baby – at the end of the day I get to choose who I want to fuck tonight and the rest can only drool! It’s not ‘cheap’ they’re thinking – it’s self pity!”

Yup – and we cant argue with that. Joe tends to gets whatever man she wants. Come to think of it, I have never seen her fail as yet. But deep down, beneath her tough exterior and her wild life, we do know that she is very lonely indeed.

Joe has only one true love – unfortunately it was someone else’s husband. Will go into that a little later... but for now, we the WAM Troops who have been together almost fora second life time now, are on a mission. A very important one... a mission to get our man.

If you are all wondering which one of them is me? I’ll leave you to do the guessing….
I might even send you a photo of redpanties as a reward :-)

Where can I find a man??

This question has been in and out of our conversations almost inevitably every weekend when 4 happy, chatty girls meet up for coffee. This particular day, it got a little more intense. The pressure came suddenly when all of us realize that we have dated, fucked and re-dated most of the male clan we know.

Hazel - "It is official then. All good men are either attached, married and have a mistress or gay."

There was silence for 5 minutes. I swear to god 5 solid minutes passed.

But seriously, where can one find a decent man with good manners, a secure job, a sense of humor and a caring heart? Do you look for them in libraries? Or are they at your friend’s party? Can you meet them in clubs? Or should you date online instead?

We have all been dating for more than 8 years now and it seems that all good men have ran out. Of course, there are left some leftovers of scums, brats and mummy's boy - we had our fair share of those, but what we really want is someone who we can fall in love with - we want someone to love and be loved.

So after much thought and debate, we all came to a conclusion and a game plan.

If it’s going to be – it’s up to me.

So we set out to do some of the things we think will get us higher chances of landing a man.

1. Attend every single invitation for dinners, parties, events and even weddings that is thrown our way.
2. Go online and start posting our pictures up with thoughtful details along the lines of young, hot, single, horny and available.
3. Smile a lot - from the bouncer to the bartender and even the cina ah bengs on the dance floor, when we go out as a group to pubs and clubs.
4. Talk to strangers .

We were all excited with our new game plan, we even gave it a name – Woman on a Mission – WAM!

We all made a pact to start right away.